After ending a long, on-and-off seven-year relationship and suddenly finding myself raising a baby alone, dating or even thinking about men was the last thing on my mind. My focus was on my business, earning money, and creating a stable home for me, my two wonderful children, and of course our sweet dogs. As a single mom navigating life and raising kids alone, I wasn’t ready to jump back into dating or situationships.

One quiet evening, as my daughter drifted off to sleep beside me, I glanced at the sky from my bedroom window and got a notification on my phone. Someone I’d known years ago had pinged me a message, reminding me of past connections and situationships I hadn’t expected to revisit.

I’d liked him back then, but I never really knew what he was feeling.

Curious, I opened the chat.

“How have you been?” he asked.

“Calm,” I replied. “And you?”

I had no idea that this conversation was about to shake up my peaceful little world.

We talked, and it felt different this time. He seemed more mature, kind, and genuine. Maybe he really had grown up, I thought. Sparks flew… until the messages suddenly went silent for days.

I let it go, thinking it was nice while it lasted.

Weeks later, he reached out again, and all that excitement came rushing back. This back-and-forth went on for months, and eventually, I realized I’d reached my limit. After being let down more than once on plans to meet, we decided to end it.

Even after all that, I was surprised by how much it affected me. Months of talking on and off had made me feel far more than I expected. I’d hoped we could bring our chemistry into real life, but I had to accept that it wasn’t meant to be.

Funny enough, I wanted this connection more than the seven-year relationship that left me with a child.

It was the “almost” that hurt, the picture I’d built in my mind of finally seeing him again. He had a really nice style, was talented, a little mysterious… and he was beautiful.

For times like this, I often turn to my favorite relationship breakup quotes for perspective and comfort.

I did my best to process the emotions and focus on what I could control.

So, if you’re struggling to move on from a situationship, navigating single mom dating life, or trying to heal after a relationship that didn’t work out, here’s what genuinely helped me.

10 Tips for Moving On From a Situationship

Say what you need to say, then walk away

When I say this, I don’t mean sending a long emotional paragraph or telling them you deserve better. You can simply say what needs to be said from your side (if anything) and leave it.

For example, we ended because of some misalignment, and I’d reacted in a way that was true for me, but I wasn’t proud of how I delivered it.

So when I felt calmer, I explained what I meant, what I needed from him, validated him, and apologised for my delivery, but not my boundary.

I wanted to walk away knowing I’d tried, while staying respectful to both of us.

He replied dismissively and with finality. That was all I needed to hear, and I left it on read.

I’d kept my integrity, stayed authentic to myself, and there was nothing more for me to say.

Was it easy to leave in silence? No. But did it feel empowering? Yes, and I’m proud of that.

Let it all out, don’t resist

In the past, I would push emotions away and try to numb the pain, talking to someone else, going out, acting like I didn’t care.

But all that does is delay healing from a situationship and carry it into the next person.

This time, I sat with it. The sadness, the anger, the frustration, the rejection. All of it.

I cried, vented, swore, went on random drives with music… and just let myself feel everything.

At first, they’re on your mind constantly. It takes a while for your brain to get used to not having their attention and notifications.

You get so much dopamine from seeing their name pop up that when it’s gone, it can genuinely feel like withdrawal.

But as the days go on, bit by bit, you start to notice moments where you’re not thinking about them.

I remember one afternoon feeling so happy just being in my garden with my daughter.

It was so lovely not having to worry about his reply, or silence, or whether I’d said the wrong thing. I could just be free.

And now I’m at the point where my manifestations are giving me so much excitement again. I’m driven in my work, and I’m looking forward to adventures that have nothing to do with a guy liking me or not.

When it feels overwhelming, talk to yourself like this

One of the most powerful things I did was how I spoke to myself when the thoughts got overwhelming.

When I started overthinking, missing him, or wondering if I’d done something wrong, I’d literally talk to myself in a calm, grounding way.

Things like:

You’re not losing him, you’re losing the inconsistency
You’ll gain respect and communication
I showed up fully, the responsibility lies with him
He will feel the loss of this more than you will
When you miss it, remember how it actually felt

When you’ve had space from a situationship, the not-so-good parts fade, and you start to miss the feelings that made you happy.

But if you’re being honest with yourself… there were red flags.

Think about them. Write them down if it helps.

Then bring yourself back to the present moment and feel grateful you’re no longer in that dynamic.

For me, I’m grateful for:

Being free to focus on my manifestations (owning a cottage, expanding my business)
Not being stuck in guessing games
Not questioning my worth
Not having my sleep and routine disrupted

Flip the script

Even when you’re doing well, those thoughts can creep back in.

“But he’s the only person I feel like I want…”
“What if I don’t feel that way again…”

This is where flipping the script helped me so much.

I’d remind myself:

Everything I saw in him already exists within me
He didn’t give me anything, he just lit up what was already there
What’s meant for me won’t miss me
If he was going to step up, he already would have
I take back my energy and my power

It’s okay to be alone for a bit

The advice is often to go out, be with friends, meet someone new. And if that works for you, do it.

But it’s also okay if you feel like retreating for a bit.

I did. I didn’t want to talk to anyone unless it was someone close to me who understood.

I wanted to be alone, process it, and let it move through me.

And that’s part of healing too.

Eventually, you’ll feel ready to be around people again, but from a more aligned place.

Remove visual reminders

One of the times I slipped back in was when I kept watching his stories, listening to voice notes, and looking at photos.

It keeps the situationship feeling alive when it should be fading.

When I stopped doing that, everything became clearer.

Reflect on what a relationship takes

I tried.

But you cannot build a relationship, or a situationship, when the other person isn’t willing to grow with you.

No matter how much effort you put in.

And this is something I had to really be honest with myself about…

Chemistry isn’t enough.

As amazing as it feels, as intense as it is, as much as it makes you feel alive… it’s not what makes something last.

A real relationship needs communication, accountability, emotional honesty, and the ability to repair things when they go wrong.

It needs consistency.

It needs someone who can meet you properly.

Not just someone who makes you feel something.

Because the truth is, you can have insane chemistry with someone… and still not be able to build anything real with them.

And that was one of the hardest things for me to accept.

Spoil yourself

This is where I am now. And honestly… this is the best part.

If you’re here, congratulations. This is where it starts to feel exciting again.

And I don’t mean “treat yourself” lightly, I mean really go for it.

Think about what lights you up. What you’re curious about. What makes you feel good.

Trying new things, starting something, buying things you love, painting your nails, creating, learning…

Yesterday I bought myself a new ring.

Technically an engagement ring, but for me. Because I wanted to.

It’s a commitment to yourself.

And when you start treating yourself like that, you naturally set the standard for what you’ll accept from others.

Because deep down you know that’s what you deserved all along.